Learning the unforced rhythms of Grace
A few months ago, my life changed dramatically, and I was not ready for it! I was offered leave from my work as a Chaplain with the intention to rest and reflect on my professional future. About one month into my leave, it became clear to me that the best way forward was to resign. Even-though I was at peace with the decision, I could not possibly have anticipated the emotional roller coaster this journey would take me on.
At times, I felt lost, lonely, sad, confused, and even angry. But whilst I understood that all these emotions were classic symptoms of grief, I realised there was more to it. I was struggling to reconnect with who I was. My Chaplaincy role had defined my life for the last 10 years and everything I did flowed out of my calling.
I was consumed by questions that only presented more questions, not answers. What now? Who am I now? What are my skills? What can I offer? What types of jobs if not Chaplaincy could I be eligible for? Every day I wrestled with these questions, and the more I searched for jobs online, the more discouraged I felt. It was a very difficult season for me. On the one hand, I wanted to enjoy this much deserved break and free time, and on the other hand, I felt lost and without vision, which in turn made me feel restless and depressed.
In the hope of finding work, I decided that I would network with organisations and many different individuals in the mentoring and supervision field. I was very active, but for all my networking, nothing happened. All my industrious efforts to find work simply failed.
Slowly, I began to understand that God was not in a hurry, I was. God wasn’t interested in what I could do for Him! He simply wanted me to spend time with Him, my family, and my friends! He also very clearly reminded me that I was still the same person, with or without a ‘title’. He loved me unconditionally and that He would guide me every day until something new was ready for me. I knew that I had to repent. I had allowed my job to become more important than God! That the ‘doing’ for Him had become bigger than the ‘being‘ with Him.
Who am I?
From this new God-centred perspective, I could answer all my questions with clarity. I am a child of God. Forgiven, redeemed, and saved by God’s Grace alone. I am here on this earth to glorify God, to live in a way that reflects his Love to others and points them to Him! I am here to be available to share the good news of Jesus Christ with the world, not because I am a Chaplain but because I am HIS beloved daughter.
God is so so good! I lost my official endorsement through the organisation I had worked for when I resigned. I could have felt anxious and unsettled but I didn’t. I felt safe and secure in God’s hands. God told me, ‘Don’t you worry. I am the One who will continue to endorse you into the future.’
Once I stopped running from my current situation, madly trying to make things happen on my own, I could see all the blessings God had given me. I began to see the many small and big opportunities that I could get involved in, like making a phone call to pray with a friend, writing to one of my children, baking a cake, getting involved in my church etc. I also treasure sitting in the sunshine with a cup of coffee, just enjoying a moment with God. Life is good!
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (NIV Matthew 11:28:30)
If you are reading this article, chances are, that you are a leader involved in ministry, maybe even in full time ministry. I want to encourage you to take some ‘time out’ to simply be with God. He longs to spend time with you. He is so in love with you, and he wants to bless you. He made you a human being not a human doing. Give Him a chance to inspire and equip you afresh as you draw close to him. Let Him be the fuel for your everyday journey. Learn the unforced rhythms of His Grace.
“So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (NIV Matthew 6:31-34)
We can help
If you’re at a crossroad in your personal, professional, spiritual life (or all three), Kingdom Leaders are here to help. Kingdom Leaders offers ministry leadership coaching, providing professional and spiritual advice, support, and guidance on your life journey. Christian based life coaching empowers and encourages Christian leaders, pastors, and chaplains to implement and fulfill God’s vision for your life. A trained Kingdom Leaders ministry coach can help you navigate changes and obstacles in your personal, professional and spiritual life. A ministry coach will listen to your concerns, identify your goals, and work with you to inspire, ignite and enable you to be all that God designed you to be. Book a FREE 30-minute Discovery Call with a Christian life coach today.
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